Friends are awesome and great and stressful and awesome and nice and fun and stressful. I hope you were excited to hear about me having a hard time opening a fridge, because i lied about that part.
Truth is, Last year i was bullied. Bullied badly. And the worst part, was that i thought they were my best friends. Think of your best friends, then imagine how it would be to have them bully you
E v e r y
S t i n k i n g
D a y.
It was awful, and hard and complete Hell.
I am pretty sure that I spent more hours solo and silent/ Crying than i did sleeping.. Not that i slept that much but the fact was : it was dumb.
"These years were marked by feeling weak and helpless. They were marked by having no response – other than fear and sorrow – to the cruelty of bullying." -Marcos Breton
The quote by Marcos Breton pretty much sums up last year. It went on for months them making jokes right in front of my face about my appearance. They even told olivia if i were to "Just work on it" That i would be skinny enough for them. I was mortified. To this day they wont see me eat because i think i have PTSD. They made me more self conscious than i have ever been in my entire life.
It started out with me and olivia and the two "Friends."
We spent hours and hours together having a blast and exploring our new found freedom with drivers licenses. We would talk and laugh and go places, and little by little they would say things that were unthought. They'd say it and sometimes even stop half way through and just not finish, but everyone knew what they meant. But these were my best friends and maybe it was just their personality right?
It didn't help that they both (AT THE SAME TIME) had a crush on olivia. They used me for olivia. I was friends with them before she was, and therefore they could use me to get to her. They left me in the ghettos of provo, and said rude jokes, they even made up an acronym about my looks and would say it every time i said anything. They pulled at my nerves, and my emotions, they damaged my self esteem, they ripped my heart, but they were my best friends so they were just telling the truth right? They were awful and relentless, and would never apologize, but they were my best friends so they were just helping me out right? It got to the point my parents knew about it and They begged me to let them talk to their parents, but i knew it would break the friendship. The two boys that bullied me also flipped it around and made everything my fault. Well its my fault i am the way i am, or its my fault this, its my fault that. They didn't even apologize, but i forgave them .... Or kind of forgave them anyway, and we went on with our lives. After the summer, and las vegas, i turned a switch. I realized that these boys were wreaking havoc on my life and i was stressed beyond belief.
After the summer i ditched them and started to be better friends with coleman.
It was weird.
Not being friends with him, no that was awesome
It was weird how he was so nice. I actually didn't know what a real friend was until then. It felt so natural that we were just nice to each other and it was amazing.
This year ive made friends with Jeffrey and reuinited with channing. It is so nice that me coleman jeffrey and channing are all friends, however I want to be friends with them and syd and olivia but sometimes its hard to make time for everyone its a stress..... Point it this year is a lot better than last year and i am glad :)
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